Funny Instagram Bios

I’m not crazy, my reality is just different than yours.

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I shouldn’t be allowed to go on Snap chat, Facebook or Instagram when I’m drunk!

My life is about as organized as the $5 DVD bin at Walt-Mart.

I still miss my ex – but guess what? My aim is getting better.

Sometimes one middle finger isn’t enough to let someone know how you feel. That’s why you have two hands.


Never put your happiness in someone else hands.

We just want to build a company that focuses on the love of Instagram. Kevin Restroom

Love is when you meet someone who tells you something new about yourself.

Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.

You are every reason, every hope and every dream I’ve ever had.

There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate.

Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life. Make the most of yourself by fanning the tiny, inner sparks of possibility into flames of achievement. Golda Meir

True humility is intelligent self respect which keeps us from thinking too highly or too meanly of ourselves. It makes us modest by reminding us how far we have come short of what we can be. Ralph W. Sock man

When time and space and change converge, we find place. We arrive in Place when we resolve things. Place is peace of mind and understanding. Place is knowledge of self. Place is resolution. Abdul Ibrahim

Self-love has very little to do with how you feel about your outer self. It’s about accepting all of yourself. Tyre Banks

Far too many people are looking for the right person instead of trying to be the right person.

We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before police.

You have to learn the rules of the game. And then you have to play better than anyone else.I’m actually not funny.

I’m just really mean and people think I am joking.

A book-store is only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking.


Now I see the secret of making the best persons, it is to grow in the open air and to eat and sleep with the earth.Walt Whitman

One should enjoy their life as your life is where you are. To be envious of others life is not living your own.

If you can conceive something believe in whatever it is with all you can. Then you will receive it.

Life is not sprint it’s a marathon and always remember that the first to Depart is not always the first to arrive.

No matter how strong of a person you are, there’s always someone who can make you weak

Whenever the sun is shining, I feel obligated to play outside! Charles M. Schulz

Discovering what you love just a trace of attention and testing. When you discover the most significant person of your life, you will make every best attempt to do your best and maintain the relationship.

If you put positive into the universe, the universe responds in kind. So many people today are wrapped up in themselves and their misery and wonder why it keeps happening. It’s simple to change. When you show a little kindness it goes a long way to making your life enjoyable.

God is working for you tonight. Heaven is holding conversations about you. Angels have been assigned to you. Be at peace.

Judge nothing and you will be happy.Forgive everything and you will be happier.Love everything and you will be happiest.